100 years

Looking at pictures of the first quarter of my life, I try to recreate a timeline of memories and remember who I was growing up. There’s a goofy looking boy and his kid sister wearing matching shirts with record sleeves on their head. Here’s one of a Baseball All-Star striking a pose glaring at an invisible pitcher. Another of an Easter Sunday when the whole family plays dress-up. There are these times we find our self reminiscing of the years we spent growing up and waiting to be “grown-up.” I couldn’t wait to grow up. I remember Mom saying “You’re wishing your life away” She was right! I look back at my life and can’t believe the quickness that change and growth have occurred. It seems like only a few years ago that I got my license to drive, (when it was really a decade ago), then High School graduation, freshman year of college, college graduation and the big wedding day. It flies by in the blink of an eye. Do you ever see your 15 year old self saying “it will be easier when, it will be great when”? Do you catch yourself saying now “man, it was easier then, it was great then”? Will we ever be content with where we are now or will we constantly look to where we have been and where we are heading to find our place and purpose?

Five for Fighting’s song, 100years has struck a cord in me lately. IF I live to be 100 years old I’ve got 84 left. I don’t want be looking back over years of my life with a wish list of things I should have, could have, or would have done if I had more time. I don’t want the next few years to slip by while I’m waiting or planning for something big to happen. It is so easy at the age I am at to try to figure out tomorrow. There’s family, career, finances; the pressures to get everything in order, and setting foundation for the rest of my life. In 100years, the singer recalls being 15 for a moment, 22 for a moment, 33 for a moment, 45 for a moment, 67, and 99 dying for just another moment. I want to be able to recognize those moments in my life that pass by as life gets hectic. I want the opportunity to spend one more moment with my wife, with my family, and friends. I want to live for the moment I’m in now. I want to do something today that I didn’t do yesterday or might not do tomorrow. I want to be able to live in just that moment; not thinking about back then or maybe when. But, now. What would that be like? Can that be done? Look at your pictures, watch your home movies. You’ll see how you and those around you have changed. Plan for the next few years or months and you’ll find stability and confidence in that. But, the time you have right this minute is all that you have promised. As I type this, right now is all I have promised. I may not get 100years, but I know I have right now. I’ve got to make this moment. Make your moment.